Well I was using my Hongkong version of M8 earlier.
It was not even connecting to my personal router (a trusty TP-Link TL-WR940) AND my laptop (Windows 10) hotspot, which infuriated me because these two offer titanium-grade connections, despite MAYBE being a bit slow.
Proped in a SIM card. Turned Mobile Data off.
Immediately it found and connected to my PC hotspot. Problem solved.
Firmware issue :)